Dear Reader,

I wish you total wellness.

If not for shingles and postherpetic neuralgia which led to the past 12 months of reading and rereading books and listening to lectures about pain and our brains … I wouldn’t have learned why I experience pain and other unpleasant signals when there is no new injury to a body part.

After receiving COVID-19 vaccine … I experienced occasional pain signals in my right knee and in my right shoulder blade, then, dull headaches, and, my two front teeth felt weak.  The knowledge I have gain about pain signals helped me understand what could be happening and how I could help myself feel better.

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I have learned from webinars and the workbook

TRANSFORMING THE BRAIN IN PAIN: NEUROPLASTIC TRANSFORMATION 

written by Michael H. Moskowitz, MD & Marla D. Golden, DO  http://neuroplastix.com that …

“We only experience pain when the electrical signals reach the thinking part of our brains.”

“This is why general anesthetics work – by separating the thinking conscious brain from the automatic survival brain. During anesthesia, the survival part of the brain stays active, but, the perceptive part of the brain is turned off.”

“The brain doesn’t just receive information from the body, but sends directions back out to tell the body what to do.” (page 4 in workbook)

“The brain ‘reads’ everything going on in the body 30 times a second for an entire life.”

“Acute pain is an alarm going off in the brain that signifies danger and/or damage to the body…. ” (page 10)

“Persistent pain … signals sets up an endless loop between body and brain, inflammatory processes become chronic, anti-inflammatory processes are overwhelmed and the nerve cells dedicated to pain increase up to five-fold.” (page 10)

“Acute pain helps with survival, while persistent pain transforms danger into misery.” (page 10)

I have learned … from Clinical Scientist / Professor Lorimer Moseley  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5p6sbi_0lLc that…

“Pain is our most sophisticated protective device.”

“The term ‘neuroplasticity‘ refers to the adaptability of our nervous system. The other side of neuroplasticity is sometimes called ‘the dark side’.”

“You can experience SEVERE pain but have NO damage.”

“You can experience NO pain but have severe damage.”

“Pain depends on how much danger your brain THINKS you are in, not how much danger you are really in.”

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As I was saying … after receiving COVID-19 vaccine … I experienced occasional pain signals in my right knee and in my right shoulder blade, then, dull headaches, and, my two front teeth felt weak.

According to https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/vaccines/different-vaccines/mrna.html Updated Oct. 18, 2021

mRNA Vaccines 

According to  https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/vaccines/different-vaccines/viralvector.html  Updated Oct. 18, 2021

Viral Vector Vaccines

[....]

In Step 2. Next, the cells display the spike protein on their surface, and our immune system recognizes that the protein doesn’t belong there. This triggers our immune system to produce antibodies and activate other immune cells to fight off what it thinks is an infection. This response is what your body might do if you got sick with COVID-19.

mRNA Vaccines and Viral Vector Vaccines have this in common  – “… activate other immune cells to fight off what it ‘thinks’ is an infection.”

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I know that my brain records my experiences throughout my lifetime … and that pain depends on how much danger my brain THINKS I am in, not how much danger I am really in.

Also, I understand why my brain would send me “danger signals” (my knee, shoulder blade)  after vaccination if my immune system “thinks” there is an infection in my body.

Why my two front teeth?   I’ve never sustained injury there.  Have I experienced pain there?  Yes I have!  For three years during my teenage years, my teeth were tortured once a week when the orthodontist tightened the wires. The front teeth needed the most “straightening” (they did sustain “injury”).  Even though that was 45 years ago, my brain remembers the pain!

To communicate to my teeth, my knee, my shoulder blade, and my temples …  that I have not sustained new injuries …  I put my hand on each body part and also tell my Brain “I have not injured myself.”  Voila!  Pain signals go away.  Beautiful Brain (I call “BB”) wants to protect Body, therefore BB occasionally sends signals, and, it’s up to me to “talk back” (communicate).

Today (October 31, 2021), while enjoying my walk, I felt an itchy stinging pain on left elbow, then the signals flowed down my arm. I applied firm comforting squeezes on those areas with my right hand. The pain went away.

Then today (November 3, 2021, 13:44) I felt a sharp pain on LEFT upper arm where vaccine would have entered BUT I had received the vaccine on my RIGHT arm.

Beautiful Brain sending me  “false alarms”.

In no way am I saying that retraining my brain is easy work.  I am still a newbie.  I am happy to report that I’ve developed a new attitude — I look forward to each new day. For me, this is BIG

I am forever grateful to everyone who cares about me and encourages me to continue helping myself heal.

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My “Get to Wellness Kit” is growing

Norman Doidge: Brain’s Healing Energies on YouTube  https://youtu.be/ifYcE4-eI_s  Dr. Doidge talks about our brains, pain, Dr. Michael Moskowitz, Moshe Feldenkrais (Physicist, Black Belt, Healer),  electrical circuits, chemistry, light, sound, vibration, brain-body connection.

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Continue using  Feldenkrais techniques that Naomi Schaeffer Draper, M.S. Physical Therapist had taught me.

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Continue using the workbook TRANSFORMING THE BRAIN IN PAIN: NEUROPLASTIC TRANSFORMATION  by

Michael H. Moskowitz, MD and Marla D. Golden, DO

Refer to the 10-page guide from Dr. Danielle Rosenman who coached me.

My job is to interrupt pain and other unpleasant signals by using any of the seven modalities or a combination of them.

Dr. Rosenman adds: “Smile for yourself and talk out loud to your Brain.”

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Continue practicing techniques I learned from Dr. Amy Grace Lam  http://amygracelam.com 

Recently Dr. Lam  gave me links to demonstrations of “tapping” to rid pain and other unpleasant symptoms.

Professor Lorimer Moseley says: “Brain is the most trainable we’ve got!”  https://people.unisa.edu.au/lorimer.moseley

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(Addendum November 4, 2021)

Continue using the 2 books written by Norman Doidge, M.D. for inspiration (Thank you, dear Loduskia “Dusky” Pierce, MFT, for having Dr. Doidge’s book on your shelf many years ago)

The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science (translated into 26 languages)

Dr. Doidge’s second book – The Brain’s Way of Healing: Remarkable Discoveries and Recoveries from the Frontiers of Neuroplasticity (translated into 19 languages so far)

https://www.normandoidge.com/

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About shingles and postherpetic neuralgia

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/postherpetic-neuralgia/symptoms-causes/syc-20376588  says:

“Postherpetic neuralgia is the most common complication of shingles. The condition affects nerve fibers and skin, causing burning pain that lasts long after the rash and blisters of shingles disappear.

The chickenpox (herpes zoster) virus causes shingles. The risk of postherpetic neuralgia increases with age, primarily affecting people older than 60. There’s no cure, but treatments can ease symptoms. For most people, postherpetic neuralgia improves over time.”

I am forever grateful to the excellent care that “Country Doctor LaH” and her precious Gracie gave me during my illness.

I am forever grateful to everyone who cares about me and encourages me to continue helping myself heal.

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As I write … I am running the movie ONLY WHEN I LAUGH (screenplay by Neil Simon; starring Marsha Mason, Kristy McNichol, James Coco, Joan Hackett; continuity by Joan Samson).  I love stories about the protagonist’s taking control of her/his own life, in spite of . . . .  The mother-daughter storyline – Wow!

ONLY WHEN I LAUGH is based on the play THE GINGERBREAD LADY by Neil Simon.

Taking control of one’s own life!  Taking control of one’s own body!  Taking control of one’s own thoughts!

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Taking control of my own life!  Taking control of my own body!  Taking control of my own thoughts!

Thank you for reading this blog post: “Beautiful Brain remembers old pain experiences, relays signals after shingles, after vaccination,” says author Teresa Jade LeYung.

For other posts related to our Beautiful Brains, Pain, and Neuroplasticity  in my blog  https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog …  If you look at right side of screen, you’ll see the category “Beautiful Brains Neuroplasticity”.  Please click on that category to get all my blog posts pertaining to the topic.

I wish you total wellness!

Sincerely,

author Teresa Jade LeYung in Paris 2018, photo by Sasa and Nan

Story Consultant and Photo Historian Teresa Jade LeYung says: “I love helping writers identify the themes in their manuscripts to hook readers, and, build and fortify their platforms before and after publication. Reach out, not stress out.”

Love Made Of Heart ®

Good day, everyone!

 In Loduskia “Dusky” Pierce’s blog post entitled “Vacations, 2020″ she  says:

“Since the whole world is restricted in movement right now with the Covid 19 pandemic, it seems like the perfect time to let our imagination and computer images take us away on a vacation.  We’ll start with spectacular versions of more traditional vacations.  Awesome nature, sometimes with housing we could only dream of getting through Airbnb. Or flying in a drone to get another perspective.  Then we’ll move to oases…because why not?  Online is definitely the easiest way to visit an oasis. Finally, if you are the type, you might enjoy picturing yourself accompanying some of the daring adventurers found in the last section …. ”

To see all the magnificent images in Dusky’s Wonder Site blog post, visit: http://www.duskyswondersite.com/human-ingenuity-category/vacations-2020/

Elliðaey Island, Iceland - image from Duskyswondersite

To see all the magnificent images in Dusky’s blog post, visit: http://www.duskyswondersite.com/human-ingenuity-category/vacations-2020/

Penne, France - image from Duskyswondersite

To see all the magnificent images in Dusky’s blog post, visit:  http://www.duskyswondersite.com/human-ingenuity-category/vacations-2020/

oasis image from Duskyswondersite

Loduskia “Dusky” Pierce’s blog post “Vacations, 2020″ transports us to magical places, safe from COVID-19.

For me … instead of  going on “vacation”, I went home to beloved City of Light via Dusky’s images.

Merci beaucoup Madame Pierce!

* * * * *

For other blog posts from Dusky:  http://www.duskyswondersite.com/

Dusky Pierce says:

“Mind/body approaches such as EMDR and Emotional Freedom Technique are scientifically proven methods that we might use to address trauma or deep emotional wounds.

” … therapy is not only about dealing with problems; it’s also about nurturing strengths. It’s obvious life can be challenging, even tragic. I understand that there are times when no ray of sunshine shines through the dark. In that case, we focus on coping with the problems at hand.

“I also know from my work as a therapist and in my own life that in the midst of the most difficult times, moments of respite, appreciation, love or laughter are often found.

“Thanks to an expanding body of research in how the brain works, we know it’s possible to intentionally cultivate such moments, increasing our inner resources and feelings of well-being. We can literally create new pathways in our brains that heighten our ability to notice instances of positive experience in the midst of the most trying times.”

http://www.duskyswondersite.com/about/

Dear Dusky,

You have helped me turn phobias into joys, grief into insight.

And, your having Dr. Norman Doidge’s book The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science in your waiting room which led me to finding his next book The Brain’s Way of Healing: Remarkable Discoveries and Recoveries from the Frontiers of Neuroplasticity – the stories and resources in both books helped me help my father, friends and myself.

I am forever grateful.

Sincerely,

Teresa Jade LeYung

Love Made Of Heart ®

author Teresa Jade LeYung, mask by Emily O.

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10 Things You Can Do to Manage COVID-19 at Home

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qPoptbtBjkg

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10 Things You Can do to Manage COVID-19 at Home presented in American Sign Language  ASL

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zDpHJdwBvw

For other posts in my blog, please go to: https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog

If you’re looking for my blog posts pertaining to our Beautiful Brains and Neuroplasticity… https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog  look at right side of screen, you’ll see the category “Beautiful Brains Neuroplasticity”.  Please click on that category to get those posts.

Wake-Up America!  Part II

Healing Racism

by Dr. Kim McMillon, Professor & Author

https://www.narrativepathsjournal.com/guest-column-wake-up-america-part-ii-healing-racism-by-dr-kim-mcmillon-professor-author/

Dr. Kim McMillon, author, historian, activist, over twenty years of experience producing theatre

The Conversation 

1. How do you become an ally to those experiencing racial oppression?
2.  The public has not protested the atrocities that have been taking place in our country, but yet during a pandemic, people are taking to the streets to protest the death of George Floyd, why?
3.   How do you believe we can change the world for the better?
4.   As a poet, how would you like to be remembered?
5.   What line or stanza of poetry best describes you?

***

Author Teresa Jade LeYung says:  The tagline in Dr. Kim McMillon’s poetathon is: “If not NOW, WHEN?” I believe that that mantra plus the ability to document incidents with our personal electronic devices (especially cellphones) plus the speed in which to broadcast content through social media add up to a World Town Crier galvanizing people to protest the murders of George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, and other victims. Here we are, fighting a global enemy named Coronavirus – people old and young risking their lives to save lives – folks making sacrifices by staying home to reduce the spread of infection – friends and neighbors sharing resources . . . yet, all the while, the hideous monster named racial injustice looms across our past and present. What can I do after protesters have gone home? How do I confront apathy and denial? I pledge to get more training from www.ihollaback.org: “We’re on a mission to end harassment—in all its forms.”  The folks at Hollaback! (in 16 countries) have developed new programs, including “Bystander Intervention to Stop Police-Sponsored Violence and Anti-Black Racist Harassment” and “Stand Up Against Street Harassment.” I pledge to not wait to read voting material right before elections but to routinely visit websites of my legislators to communicate to them what laws I want changed, so that I stand with fellow Americans to fully exercise our rights to “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” http://www.archives.gov/founding-docs/declaration

***

Author Teresa Jade LeYung says:  How can we change the world for the better?  While I have no answers, questions weigh on me as a U.S. citizen.

• Education – “Why do zip codes influence how much money a child receives in public schools?  Do ballot measures show this inequality?” https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/tale-two-zip-codes-covid-19-exposes-deep-disparities-u-n1227646
  
• ***
• When the media brag about lowest unemployment rate, I want to know: “How many of these jobs actually pay a living wage?” “Who are selling and buying ‘cheap labor’ and where are the human beings toiling?”https://livingwage.mit.edu/articles  and https://livingwage.mit.edu/articles/61-new-living-wage-data-for-now-available-on-the-tool and https://www.worldhunger.org/  and  https://www.worldhunger.org/hunger-news/united-states/
• ***
• When groups blame immigrants and migrant workers (all tax payers by the way) for “taking away” jobs, I ask  “Why are we denying the fact that U.S. companies send millions of jobs overseas?”  and “What happened to the companies who had urged us to be patriotic by buying products made in the U.S.A.?”  https://www.thebalance.com/how-outsourcing-jobs-affects-the-u-s-economy-3306279
• ***
• Why are we afraid to look at “ugly”?
• Abject Poverty https://www.un.org/en/sections/issues-depth/poverty/
• ***
• Hate and Bigotry https://www.splcenter.org/what-we-do
• ***
• Modern day Slavery also known as Human Trafficking https://www.acf.hhs.gov/otip/partnerships/look-beneath-the-surface
• ***

Do we have a chance of becoming our better selves? Yes! We can wake up! Perhaps if we continue asking lawmakers these and other questions, our united voices shall change the world for the better.

https://www.ihollaback.org  Hollaback!  in 20 cities globally!

***

https://www.standup-international.com/fr/fr  Agissons ensemble contre le harcèlement de rue.

***

 https://www.standagainsthatred.org/   Stand Against Hate

***

https://www.asianpacificpolicyandplanningcouncil.org/stop-aapi-hate/  Stop AAPI Hate

I wish you and everyone around you safety, kindness, excellent health, clear water, blue sky, delicious foods, and sweet laughter!

Bonne journée!

Sincerely,

author Teresa Jade LeYung, mask by Emily O, July 2020 COVID-19 pandemic

Author and Theme Consultant Teresa Jade LeYung

“To help prevent spread of COVID-19, I wear face-covering AND keep at least 6-foot distance with people who don’t live with me.  No blaming No shaming; I protect myself and everyone else.”

Teresa Jade LeYung, American naturalized citizen of Chinese ancestry, is a manuscript-theme consultant, author of Love Made Of Heart (archived at the San Francisco History Center), Build Your Writer’s Platform & Fanbase In 22 Days, and Talking To My Dead Mom monologues, and, advocate for public libraries and public schools. Teresa speaks out and offers resources through her Blog: http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

Thank you, Ms. Vanessa Miller of Hollaback!, for today’s excellent training.

In 2020, Hollaback! and L’Oréal Paris join forces to ensure everyone’s self-worth, leveraging Hollaback!’s 5 D’s methodology to help people safely intervene when they experience or witness harassment in public spaces.The goal of the Stand Up program is to train 1,000,000 people to become Upstanders before the end of 2021 and ultimately build a culture where street harassment is seen as unacceptable behavior.

http://standup-france.com

STAND UP Against Street Harassment

In any language, we see what is happening and how we can STAND UP against harassment.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w7J5N4qfflk

“Street harassment ends here. We see it happen, but uncomfortably look away. We feel the urge to speak up, but stay cautiously silent. We all want to do something about it, but don’t know what. Or worse, we end up thinking it’s ‘not a big deal.’ Street harassment is always a BIG deal. And now, we have what it takes to stand up to it. It’s always worth it.”

https://www.ihollaback.org/stand-street-harassment/

https://www.ihollaback.org  in 20 cities globally!

https://www.ihollaback.org/harassmenttraining/

Watching this video … I clearly see that I don’t need to know a particular language (when I am traveling) to know how to take care of myself and also how to be an “Upstander” (instead of a helpless bystander) when confronted by street harassment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w7J5N4qfflk

Agissons ensemble contre le harcèlement de rue | STAND UP | L’Oréal® Paris

81% des femmes en France déclarent avoir été victimes de harcèlement sexuel dans les lieux publics. Seulement 20% déclarent avoir été aidées par quelqu’un. Nous pouvons tous agir. Informez-vous et formez-vous sur http://standup-france.com

En partenariat avec Hollaback! et la Fondation des Femmes, L’Oréal Paris lance Stand Up: un mouvement voué à nous apprendre à tous et à toutes à réagir que l’on soit victimes ou témoins de harcèlement sexuel dans les lieux publics. — Abonnez-vous à notre chaîne YouTube pour en savoir davantage sur Stand Up : http://youtube.com/lorealparisfrance Retrouvez-nous sur les réseaux sociaux : Facebook : http://facebook.com/lorealparisfrance Twitter : http://twitter.com/@lorealparisfr Instagram : http://instagram.com/lorealparis Pinterest : http://pinterest.com/lorealparisfr Snapchat : @lorealparisfr

Thank you, Hollaback! and L’Oréal Paris, for showing us

how to “STAND UP Against Street Harassment”

Merci beaucoup Hollaback! et L’Oréal Paris!

Merci beaucoup mes amies!

I wish you and everyone around you safety, kindness, excellent health, clear water, blue sky, delicious foods, and sweet laughter!

Bonne journée!

Sincerely,

author Teresa Jade LeYung, mask by Emily O, July 2020 COVID-19 pandemic

Author and Theme Consultant Teresa Jade LeYung

“To help prevent spread of COVID-19, I wear face-covering AND keep at least 6-foot distance with people who don’t live with me.  No blaming No shaming; I protect myself and everyone else.”

Report a Hate Crime at:

14:58  31 July 2020 California

Studying the performance by actress Marsha Mason (portraying Maggie Paul) in the movie CINDERELLA LIBERTY  (screenplay by Darryl Ponicsan) led me to watching (again) the movie THE GOODBYE GIRL (written by Neil Simon) where Ms. Mason portrays Paula McFadden.

By the way – the term “Cinderella Liberty” is used in the Navy -  a pass that expires at midnight.

In the movie The Goodbye Girl,  Richard Dreyfuss portrays Elliot Garfield (Mr. Dreyfuss’s performance brought him the Best Actor Oscar award.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-whraNgiWH0 )

In the movie version of the play LOST IN YONKERS (written by Neil Simon), Mr. Dreyfuss portrays Louie Kurnitz (Uncle Louie the gangster).

One video leads to another to another ….

Mindscape: Oscar-winning Actor Richard Dreyfuss on Living with Bipolar Disorder https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AsE6c4XkiAc

The Menninger Clinic Chief of Staff John M. Oldham, MD, MS interviews actor Richard Dreyfuss who talks about his experience living with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder also known as manic depressive disorder.

Mr. Dreyfuss said:

“I started calling myself manic-depressive when I was 14.”

“… when people say ‘I looked up at the stars, I realized how small I was.’  Well, when I looked up at the stars, I knew how big I was.”

Dr. Oldham asked Mr. Dreyfuss about stigmas.

Mr. Dreyfuss said:

“I did not fall into the trap of hating myself.”

“One of the reasons I said that my manic-depression worked for me was that I was able to turn every bad thing into a good thing … when I was not a good academic student, I became the best glib talker in class. They couldn’t fail me because I was too vivid….”

“Right protocol of medication. I am Richard inclusive of my drugs.”

“The darkness of depression”

Mr. Dreyfuss didn’t use one-word adjectives; he told us stories (his experiences), he painted pictures for us.

Thank you, Mr. Dreyfuss! You have helped me gain understanding of how my mother suffered, also how she thrived, living with mental illness.

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Stamp Out Stigma is a consumer driven advocacy and educational outreach program designed to make positive changes in the public perception of mental illness and inform the community about the personal, social, economic and political challenges faced by people living with mental illness. Founded by Carmen Lee. Ms. Lee has moved to eastern USA. Ms. Lee, wherever you go, you educate, inspire, and empower us. Thank you!

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To: Mr. Sam Huss, Community Outreach Specialist at RehabSpot.com

Thank you for your email of July 30, 2020 asking me to include your page  “Determining If You Need Rehab or Detox” https://www.rehabspot.com/treatment/before-begins/determining-need-rehab/

BOOKS:

The Brain’s Way of Healing: Stories of Remarkable Recoveries and Discoveries by Norman Doidge, M.D.

The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science by Norman Doidge, M.D.

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http://californiaclubhouse.org/

California Clubhouse… Working to bring Clubhouse to San Mateo County in 2014  
     Our mission The mission of California Clubhouse is to give those whose lives have been disrupted by mental illness the opportunity to recover meaningful work and relationships as they reintegrate into the broader community.

Thank you, Diane W., for telling me about California Clubhouse’s  immediate goal to raise $350,000 to finance the 2014 launch.  June 2016 now – California Clubhouse’s home is in San Carlos!

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https://nami.org/

National Alliance on Mental Illness

From its inception in 1979, NAMI has been dedicated to improving the lives of individuals and families affected by mental illness.

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https://bringchange2mind.org/

 1 in 6 adults and almost 1 in 10 children suffer from a diagnosable mental illness. Yet, for many, the stigma associated with the illness, can be as great a challenge as the disease itself. This is where the misconceptions stop. This is where bias comes to an end. This is where we change lives. Because this is where we Bring Change 2 Mind.

BringChange2Mind.org is a not-for-profit organization created by Glenn Close, the Child and Adolescent Bipolar Foundation (CABF), Fountain House, and Garen and Shari Staglin of IMHRO (International Mental Health Research Organization).

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How the movie The Goodbye Girl and the movie Lost In Yonkers led to Dr. John M. Oldham’s interviewing Oscar-winner Actor Richard Dreyfuss Living with Bipolar Disorder, Manic Depression… led to my gaining a better understanding of how my mother suffered and also thrived living with mental illness.

I wish you and everyone around you safety, kindness, excellent health, clear water, blue sky, delicious eats, and sweet laughter!

Sincerely,

author Teresa Jade LeYung, mask by Emily O, July 2020 COVID-19 pandemic

Author and Theme Consultant Teresa Jade LeYung

“To help prevent spread of COVID-19, I wear face-covering AND keep at least 6-foot distance with people who don’t live with me.  No blaming No shaming; I protect myself and everyone else.”

June 3, 10, 18, 25, 2020

Report a Hate Crime at:

Reading Victoria Sweet, M.D.’s new book SLOW MEDICINE The Way to Healing https://www.victoriasweet.com/ and watching/listening to Carole King (“A Conversation with Carole King” – Veteran journalist Mike Barnicle talks to Ms. King about her memoir A NATURAL  WOMAN at John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum on April 12, 2012) https://www.jfklibrary.org/events-and-awards/forums/2012-04-12-a-conversation-with-carole-king motivated my completing Part 2 of Author Teresa Jade LeYung’s New Monologue “What The Man In 17-B Wanted”

In my blog post http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/blog-post-3-of-3-papa-makes-decision-while-in-nursing-home-again-by-teresa-jade-leyung/  my father was coping with his circumstances – as a reluctant resident at a nursing home.

This is what happened in November and December 2018.

Remember that piece of paper that I needed to fill out for the nursing home staff? The one about naming a mortuary.  Every resident must fill out that form http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/author-teresa-jade-leyungs-new-monologue-what-the-man-in-17-b-wanted-part-1/

Well, there is another form to deal with – “Notice to Terminate Lease” -  the agreement between my father and the apartment building property management – that a tenant must give up his lease after six months of absence and vacate his apartment.

I waited for a “good” day to show this second document to my father.  Only his signature would be accepted by the property manager.  That day, Papa appeared to be cheerful, the sun was shining. I said to him: “Papa, remember you went to the hospital in July? You’re safe here with nurses and CNAs who care about you. Your Social Security money is paying for you to be here. There is no money to pay for your apartment too. Also, the lease says that you have to give up the apartment by end of December. I will help you. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of everything. You just have to sign this paper.  Okay?”

He signed.  I don’t know what happened after I said “Goodnight” to him. He probably cried when no one was watching.

What I didn’t have the heart to tell him was that every object which represented his life had to go away – to a storage unit , to a recycling center, or to the dump. If not for my brother’s first wife and four other precious friends, I wouldn’t have been strong enough to take on this job.

What irony for a writer – I (narrator) wanted to give my father (protagonist) what he wanted (to be able to return to the place he called “home”) but he was a fall risk and could no longer live alone.  Because he was relying on me to be his advocate, and,  because he didn’t get what he wanted most, he probably viewed me as an obstacle as well.

Like the son in the movie Garbo Speaks (written by Larry Grusin), I was the daughter who was worn out chasing after something that seemed impossible to obtain.

Back to that first piece of paper that I needed to fill out for the nursing home staff.

I need to do the right thing when Papa dies. Mrs. Chu, the oldest resident at the nursing home, is 107! My father is only 85. He has a long way to go.

Does my father want to be buried or cremated? He won’t talk about illness, certainly not about funeral.  I cannot read his mind.

Thanks to Dr. Amy Grace Lam who said to me “Teresa, you will get your answer not by asking your father but by finding the right person to ask your father.”

The right person would be someone who speaks fluent Cantonese and is the archetype to ask such a question.

On the day when all three Cantonese-speaking team members (nurse, social worker, chaplain) showed up at the nursing home to meet my father and me, Amy Grace Lam’s words replayed in my head.

I showed Chaplain Yuen the piece of paper  and told him: “I want to honor my father’s body and need to know what he wants.”

I did not need to explain any further; the chaplain nodded, and took the paper from my hand.

While he was chatting with my father, I stepped aside to talk to the nurse and social worker.

Fifteen minutes later, I hear Chaplain Yuen telling my father that he would visit again.  As though a director was in the room and we were all rehearsing a scene, a CNA comes into the room to distract my father. The chaplain says to me: “Your father wants burial, not cremation.”  The social worker tells me that she’ll get me a list of mortuaries which will include those catering to families of Chinese heritage.

I got what I wanted – the answer to my question. What more can a daughter ask for.

photo by Teresa Jade LeYung 2018 November 20

I wish you, dear Reader, excellent health.

For other posts in my blog, please go to: https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog

If you’re looking for my blog posts pertaining to our Beautiful Brains and Neuroplasticity… https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog  look at right side of screen, you’ll see the category “Beautiful Brains Neuroplasticity”.  Please click on that category to get those posts.

Sincerely,

Teresa Jade LeYung

Teresa Jade LeYung - photo by Sharon Leong 2019 May 10

As a story theme consultant, award-winning writer, and platform-building coach for pre-published and published authors, Writing Coach TERESA JADE LEYUNG empowers her clients to identify their core themes in their manuscripts and career mapping.
http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog

TERESA JADE LEYUNG (formerly Teresa LeYung-Ryan) is the author of:

Love Made Of Heart

Build Your Writer’s Platform & Fanbase In 22 Days: Attract Agents, Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention NOW

Talking to My Dead Mom monologues

“What The Man In 17-B Wanted”  Part 1

When my papa was admitted to the nursing home, the folks in Social Services asked me to complete a half-inch-thick packet. A lot of it was reading material. There was this sheet of paper asking for name of mortuary.

Why? In straight language, when a resident “expires” (dies), the nursing home must remove “the remains” (the dead body) out of the facilities within four hours of death.

Since there are three residents in a room, you just can’t leave a deceased person in his bed as though he were in a private home.

I remember the night when my papa called me, to tell me that his roommate died, that he was afraid to sleep in the room and wanted me to go over there and take him to a hotel. I explained that he himself is a fall risk, I couldn’t just put him in a taxi and send him to a hotel. I suggested that he stay near the nurse’s station. Later that evening when I called his nurse, she said that he was in the hallway, fell asleep in his wheelchair. Later after his deceased roommate had been taken away, his CNA helped him back to bed.

Back to this sheet of paper … If this document isn’t filled out, then, at time of death, the dead body would be transported to the mortuary that the nursing home has a contract with. If that mortuary is not the one that the deceased or the deceased’s representative wanted, then, the representative would have to pay the “transfer” cost (moving dead body from first mortuary to second mortuary) in addition to the transport cost (the original ride from nursing home to the first mortuary).

The dollar amount of the transportation cost would come close to about 50 taxi rides to go half-way across town in San Francisco; double that if a “transfer” fee is incurred.

Every three or four months, the kindhearted staff would remind me about “that” sheet of paper.

Truthfully, I would like to know what my father wants. Does he want to be cremated or buried?  I can’t ask him.  The look on his face – when I dare to utter any word related to the subject of death – says: “Aah, daughter, so, that is why you are leaving me here.”

Most days, I say to myself: He’s so afraid of dying, he’ll be around another 15 years. I’ll probably die before he does.

[ Separate matter – regarding “Arbitration Agreement”  Thanks to two friends and the honesty of a staff member at the nursing home who spoke frankly…”If you don’t want to sign this…just write ‘decline to sign’ and date it.” http://www.canhr.org/arbitration/index.html  California Advocates for Nursing Home Reform (CANHR) says: “Don’t sign Arbitration Agreements in nursing homes and residential care facilities” ]

Sincerely,

Teresa_Jade_LeYung_in_Paris_photo_by_Sasa_or_Nan

Teresa Jade LeYung

an alumna of A Place of Her Own 2018

Teresa Jade LeYung of Love Made Of Heart says: “When I’m in Paris, I know I have come home.”

As an award-winning author,  theme consultant and writing coach, Teresa empowers writers to transform their dearest dreams into reality.

For other posts in my blog, please go to: https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog

If you’re looking for my blog posts pertaining to our Beautiful Brains and Neuroplasticity… https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog  look at right side of screen, you’ll see the category “Beautiful Brains Neuroplasticity”.  Please click on that category to get those posts.