What to do before hiring an editor for your manuscript?

My advice for narrative non-fiction writers is the same for fiction writers.

“Look at Your Manuscript with an Editor’s Lens”

by Teresa LeYung Ryan–Developmental Editor/Manuscript Consultant/Writing Career Coach

Since writing a story with the intent to engage the reader is so much like meeting a stranger and wanting him/her to be interested in us, I will focus on “how to make the first quarter of your story a compelling read.”

I love working with diligent writers who want to transform their manuscripts into page-turners. However, there are things you can do before you give your work to an editor. Let me show you how you can help yourself.

Does your manuscript pass these tests?

• Planting hook(s) or story-question(s);
• Grounding the reader with the three Ws and the big C (Who?  When?  Where? Circumstances);
• Showing (not telling) what the protagonist wants;
• Paying attention to language and rules

Let’s learn from the pros.

Planting Hook or Story-Question:

In The Woman Warrior: Memoirs of a Girlhood Among Ghosts, Maxine Hong Kingston hooks us with the first line: “You must not tell anyone,” my mother said, “what I am about to tell you…”   Then, Ms. Kingston transitions into her story with:  “Whenever she had to warn us about life, my mother told stories that ran like this one . . .”

Grounding the Reader with the Three Ws and the big C:

In Woven of Water, while the story timeline spans from 1957 to 2005, Californian author Luisa Adams brilliantly shows us who she was as a girl (not with a year-by-year narrative, but with a single exquisite chapter).  Because she grounded us with “who, when, where” and the “circumstances” as to why she had left her love affair with water, we eagerly follow as she takes us into her enchanted world of a “cottage in the forest.”  Another device to ground the reader is the employment of sensory details (not long descriptions).  Sensory details put the reader in the scene/story world.  Re-read one of your favorite author’s books. Study from the masters.

Showing What the Protagonist Wants:

In The Other Mother, young Carol Schaefer wants to ask questions:  “Was there any way to keep my baby?  Was there anyone who would help me find a way to do that?”

In Eat, Pray, Love, Elisabeth Gilbert says: I wish Giovanni would kiss me.

In Love Made of Heart, my protagonist Ruby Lin prays: Please don’t end up like Grandmother (while witnessing police officers escorting her own mother out of her apartment).

Paying Attention to Language and Rules:

Read the first five pages of Angela’s Ashes by Frank McCourt and you will see how this wordsmith plays with language and rules. (You can “bend” the rules to create flow, but you must not ignore them.)

In Bastard Out of Carolina, Dorothy Allison’s protagonist Bone is a girl.  Bone’s voice is convincing in dialogue and in internal monologue. Brilliant use of dialect.

Sentences Deserve Your Attention:

Remember Groucho Marx’s line “One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas…”? That sentence got a lot of laughs.  But, what if you didn’t want to be funny (ambiguous in this case)?

How would you rewrite these sentences?  See the misplaced modifiers?

• He likes to fish near the Farallon Islands, they jump when they’re hungry at dawn or dusk. (the islands jump?)
• She insists on knowing when I come home and leave, not to be nosy, but for safety reasons. (who is not nosy?)
• Being cautious as not to step on the dog’s tail, the children tip-toed away from him while sleeping. (who’s sleeping?)

To improve your sentence structure and other skills, I recommend these books:

• The Elements of Style by William Strunk, Jr. and E.B. White
• Woe is I: Grammarphobe’s Guide to Better English in Plain English by Patricia T. O’Conner

More Advice:

• In all the stories I referenced above, the authors present memorable experiences by employing authentic details, unusual story-worlds though real, and poetic language. You want to do the same for your story.
• Also, these stories have another vital component–all the plotlines have what Martha Alderson, author of Blockbuster Plots Pure and Simple, calls “Cause and Effect” linked scenes.  Another must-read blog:  http://plotwhisperer.blogspot.com/search?q=first+quarter
• When you’re writing non-fiction and you do not have the luxury of rearranging the sequence of events to create a page-turning plotline, you can engage the reader by using concise expositions to leap over blocks of time in order to focus on the core themes and fast-forward to the next scene.  A helpful website for memoir writers: http://www.memoriesandmemoirs.com
• You the author must show the reader what the protagonist wants, even if the protagonist doesn’t know at first.
• We don’t have to “like” a protagonist, but, we do need to connect with him/her on an emotional level. Perhaps what he/she wants is also what we want.
• Story-telling is a skill learned, practiced, and mastered. May you practice with joy.

In the fiercely competitive arena of the publishing world, how does one stand out in a crowd?  Building relationships is one key to success in this business. Another key is to know how to translate the themes from your life to your writing and articulate those themes as community concerns.  I want to see all hardworking writers realize their dreams. My best wishes to you!

To read other posts in my blog (about writing contests, publishing opportunities, more tips on platform-building), click on [ Home ] and scroll down  OR key in words in the search box to find specific posts. Example: if you key in the words: poetry anthology 2011 into my blog’s search box and click [search], you will see my post containing info about the  Las Positas College Anthology and other contests for other genres (Thank you, Poet Laureate Deborah Grossman!) To read the entire version of a post, click on the title bar of that post.

To see my website for all my books, go to:  http://writingcoachteresa.com

Reach out, not stress out!

Sincerely,

Build-Your-Writer’s-Platform Coach Teresa

Teresa LeYung Ryan–Developmental Editor/Manuscript Consultant, Writing Career Coach, Author, Publisher

Teresa specializes in editing fiction and narrative non-fiction with themes on the human condition.

She likes spunky protagonists in thrillers, women’s novels, memoirs, and children’s literature.

Love Made of Heart is:
• recommended by the California School Library Association and the California Reading Association

• read by students at Stanford University, U.C. Berkeley, CCSF, and many other colleges and high schools.

• used in Advanced Composition English-as-a-Second-Language classes
• archived at the San Francisco History Center

Teresa says: “The more you read, the more your own writing will flow.”  
Please click here for my blog’s home page  http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

My fun workbook is now available through Amazon!

BUILD YOUR WRITER’S PLATFORM & FANBASE IN 22 DAYS: Attract Agents, Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention NOW

http://www.amazon.com/Build-Your-Writers-Platform-Fanbase/dp/0983010005/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1297630400&sr=1-1

http://lovemadeofheart.com/BUILD-YOUR-WRITER%27S-PLATFORM-&-FANBASE-IN-22-DAYS.html

The 20th Annual PEN Oakland-Josephine Miles National Literary Awards will take place on Saturday, December 11, 2010, at the Oakland Public Library, Rockridge Branch, 5366 College Avenue–from 2 to 5 p.m.

I, Teresa LeYung Ryan (manuscript consultant & writing career coach), will be there with my pal Kim McMillon (playwright and radio show producer).

The ceremony, which will be followed by a reception and book signings, is free and open to the public. Former state Senate President Pro Tem Don Perata will be the keynote speaker.

PEN Oakland, founded in 1989, is a chapter of PEN International, founded in 1921.
Dubbed “the blue collar PEN” by the New York Times, PEN Oakland annually sponsors the PEN Oakland-Josephine Miles Book Awards, named for the late poet and faculty member of U.C. Berkeley’s English Department. This year marks the 20th anniversary of the awards.
Each year PEN Oakland presents an award to outstanding book titles published in the previous year.

For names and book titles of the 2010 PEN Oakland-Josephine Miles Literary Award winners:

http://beattiesbookblog.blogspot.com/2010/12/pen-oakland-20th-annual-2010-literary.html

See you there!

Sincerely,

Teresa LeYung Ryan

GraceArt Publishing is the publisher of Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention. Paypal is available http://writingcoachteresa.com

Teresa says: “Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.”  

I went to Diablo Actors Ensemble with  Elisa’s father-in-law and sister-in-law Kaer Soutthard of Executive Support Solutions and CardkinArts.

http://executivesupportsolutions.biz/

Twelve Angry Men is one of the plays I would watch again and again.  Reginald Rose’s lines/expressions of prejudices are raw and timeless.  Every moment in the play is layered with dramatic tension.

What is the play Twelve Angry Men about?

Twelve jurors in deliberation.   A sixteen-year-old Latino is charged with murder/stabbing his father in the chest with a switchblade. Will the jurors find him “not guilty”?  Or will they vote “guilty”?   The verdict of guilty will mean the death penalty for the boy. One juror stands alone to say: “I have reasonable doubt.”

Will Southard as Juror 8 in what I'd call symbolism in stage direction of "looking out" and "thinking outside the box"

Fine performances by Will Southard and his fellow cast members.  Bravo, Will !

This engagement is pretty much sold-out.  Contact the Diablo Actors Ensemble (a 50-seat theater) in Walnut Creek, CA

If I were given the opportunity to audition for a part in this play, I would want to be Juror #5 (portrayed by Eddie Peabody for Diablo Actors Ensemble, by Jack Klugman in the film, and by Lee Philips in the teleplay.)

I applaud the cast, director Vince Faso, the crew, Artistic Director Scott Fryer (who was also Foreman in the cast), Managing Director Samantha Fryer, and DAE board members and volunteers.

Elisa Southard, recent-keynote speaker at the Redwood Writers Conference, I thank you again for inviting me to this powerful performance.   My party afterward (stimulating conversations with playwright/director Kathryn McCarty, Elisa’s and Will’s siblings, their in-laws and friends) was icing on the cake!

http://www.enotes.com/twelve-angry-men

In the teleplay, Robert Cummings was Juror #8,  Franchot Tone Juror #3, and Edward Arnold Juror #10. I’m going to look for a copy of teleplay.

Sincerely,

Teresa LeYung Ryan

Book Doctor/Manuscript Consultant, Writing Career Coach, Author, Publisher

Teresa specializes in editing fiction with universal themes; women’s memoirs; novels for young adults; short stories.  She likes spunky protagonists.

Love Made of Heart is:
• recommended by the California School Library Association and the California Reading Association

• read by students at Stanford University, U.C. Berkeley, CCSF, and many other colleges and high schools.

• used in Advanced Composition English-as-a-Second-Language classes
• archived at the San Francisco History Center

GraceArt Publishing is the publisher of Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention.

Teresa says: “Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.”  

To comment on any of my columns (blog posts), just click on the blue title bar of the post, fill in the boxes and press “submit.”  Please click here for my blog http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

The question is answered by Teresa LeYung Ryan–Book Doctor/Manuscript Consultant, Career Coach, Author

Nina Amir, creator of Write Nonfiction in November http://writenonfictioninnovember.com/ had invited me to be her guest-blogger in 2008, to help answer that question.  My advice for narrative non-fiction writers is the same for fiction writers.

“How to Look at Your Manuscript with an Editor’s Lens”

Since writing a story with the intent to engage the reader is so much like meeting a stranger and wanting him/her to be interested in you, I will focus on how to make the first quarter of your story a compelling read.

I love working with diligent writers who want to transform their manuscripts into page-turners. However, there are things you can do before you give your work to an editor. Let me show you how you can help yourself.

As an editor, the four biggest mistakes I encounter are manuscripts that are weak in these elements:

• Planting hook(s) or story-question(s);
• Grounding the reader with the three Ws (Who?  When?  Where?);
• Showing (not telling) what the protagonist wants;
• Paying attention to language and rules

Let’s learn from the pros.

Planting Hook or Story-Question:

In The Woman Warrior: Memoirs of a Girlhood Among Ghosts, Maxine Hong Kingston hooks us with the first line: “You must not tell anyone,” my mother said, “what I am about to tell you…”   Then, Ms. Kingston transitions into her story with:  “Whenever she had to warn us about life, my mother told stories that ran like this one . . .”

Grounding the Reader with the Three Ws:

In Woven of Water, while the story timeline spans from 1957 to 2005, Californian author Luisa Adams brilliantly shows us who she was as a girl (not with a year-by-year narrative, but with a single exquisite chapter).  Because she grounded us with “who, when, where,” we eagerly follow as she takes us into her enchanted world of a “cottage in the forest.”  Another device to ground the reader is the employment of sensory details (not long descriptions).  Sensory details put the reader in the scene/story world.  Re-read one of your favorite author’s books. Study from the masters.

Showing What the Protagonist Wants:

In The Other Mother, young Carol Schaefer wants to ask questions:  “Was there any way to keep my baby?  Was there anyone who would help me find a way to do that?”

Paying Attention to Language and Rules:

Read the first five pages of Angela’s Ashes by Frank McCourt and you will see how this wordsmith plays with language and rules. (You can “bend” the rules to create flow, but you must not ignore them.)

Sentences Deserve Your Attention:

Nina Amir’s post on her blog  http://writenonfictioninnovember.wordpress.com/2007/11/ is a must-read.

Remember Groucho Marx’s line “One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas…”? That sentence got a lot of laughs.  But, what if you didn’t want to be funny (ambiguous in this case)?

How would you rewrite these poorly constructed sentences?

• He likes to fish near the Farallon Islands and they jump when they’re hungry at dawn or dusk.
• She insists on knowing when I come home and leave, not to be nosy, but for safety reasons.
• Being cautious as not to step on the dog’s tail, the children tip-toed away from him while sleeping.
• My husband still in bed snoring, I have always enjoyed rising before dawn and I eat my toast and drink my green tea on the terrace.

To improve your sentence structure and other skills, I recommend these books:

• The Elements of Style by William Strunk, Jr. and E.B. White
• Woe is I: Grammarphobe’s Guide to Better English in Plain English by Patricia T. O’Conner

More Advice:

• In all four stories (The Woman Warrior, Woven of Water, The Other Mother, Angela’s Ashes), the authors present memorable experiences by employing authentic details, unusual story-worlds though real, and poetic language. You want to do the same for your story.
• Also, these stories have another vital component-all four plotlines have what Martha Alderson, author of Blockbuster Plots, Pure and Simple, calls “Cause and Effect” linked scenes.  Another must-read blog:  http://plotwhisperer.blogspot.com/search?q=first+quarter
• When you’re writing non-fiction and do not have the luxury of rearranging the sequence of events to create a page-turning plotline, you can engage the reader by using concise expositions to leap over blocks of time in order to focus on the core themes and fast-forward the story. A helpful website: http://www.memoriesandmemoirs.com
• You the author must show the reader what the protagonist wants, even if the protagonist doesn’t know at first.
• We don’t have to “like” a protagonist, but, we do need to connect with him/her on an emotional level.

In the fiercely competitive arena of the publishing world, how does one stand out in a crowd?  Building relationships is one key to success in this business. Another key is to know how to translate the themes from your life to your writing and articulate those themes as community concerns.  I want to see all hardworking writers realize their dreams. My best wishes to you!

Do you know a writer who wants to go to a writers’ conference but can’t afford it? Encourage her/him to ask family and friends to chip in (what better Christmas gift or birthday gift!).

For non-fiction authors: Writing for Change Conference http://www.sfwritingforchange.org/

For both fiction and non-fiction authors:  San Francisco Writers Conference http://sfwriters.org

Sincerely,

Teresa LeYung Ryan

Book Doctor/Manuscript Consultant, Career Coach, Author, Publisher

Coach Teresa edits manuscripts for authors who want to attract agents  & publishers  OR  want to be their own publishers. She specializes in contemporary novels, thrillers, children’s & YA novels, memoirs, short stories, and anthologies. She likes spunky protagonists.

Love Made of Heart is:
• recommended by the California School Library Association and the California Reading Association

• read by students at Stanford University, U.C. Berkeley, CCSF, and many other colleges and high schools.

• used in Advanced Composition English-as-a-Second-Language classes
• archived at the San Francisco History Center

GraceArt Publishing is the publisher of Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention.

Teresa says: “Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.”  

To comment on any of my columns (blog posts), just click on the blue title bar of the post, fill in the boxes and press “submit.”  Please click here for my blog http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

My Writer’s Resolutions for this Month or Year

For the writers who are building their names, click on the title-bar of this post to get the comment box.  Tell the world what your resolutions are for this month or year.

Copy what you have written, then paste that into your own blog and to my other blog post at  http://writingcoachteresa.wordpress.com/2010/11/07/my-writers-resolutions-for-this-month-or-year/

Sincerely,

Teresa LeYung Ryan

Writing Career Coach Teresa says: “Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.”

Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention ]]> https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/my-writer%e2%80%99s-resolutions-for-this-month-or-year/feed/ 20 https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/a-week-of-wearing-3-hats-author-publisher-writing-career-coach/ https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/a-week-of-wearing-3-hats-author-publisher-writing-career-coach/#comments Wed, 03 Nov 2010 05:50:41 +0000 admin http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/?p=1635 A Week of Wearing 3 Hats – Writing Career Coach – Author -  Publisher

As Writing Career Coach

I presented “Build My Name, Beat the Game” to delightful writers at the Redwood Writers Conference.  Writers in my session, please scroll down until you see my post/column entitled “Redwood Writers Conference Pure Joy” and follow instructions please to build your names.

There’s post-conference work for me.  I’ll email colleagues and follow up on our conversations; I’ll email writers in my session some coaching notes; I’ll pitch my workshop to other organizations.

Do you know a non-fiction writer who wants to go to a writers’  conference but can’t afford it? Encourage her/him to ask family and  friends to chip in (what better Christmas gift or birthday gift!).   Check out Writing for Change Conference.

As Author

I’m writing down “gems” as they pop into my head.  Gems in the form of dialogue, metaphors, descriptions, hooks, and story-questions.

I had a chance to chat with Martha Engber at the Redwood Writers Conference and read the jacket copy of her novel  The Wind Thief.  I started reading it when I got home Saturday night and have been reading a little everyday.  What lovely prose and sensory details! What a gifted writer.  Tanya Egan Gibson is another gifted writer; I’m also reading her novel How to Buy a Love of Reading. My reading well-written books can only make me a better writer.

As Publisher

I’m updating Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention so that I can take the next step in publishing the next edition–and that is letting Nancy Mulvany create the index.

This evening I attended a Business and Leadership program at the Commonwealth Club on “iPad Revolution and the Future of Digital Magazines” with Matthew Davis of Zinio and Matt Carlson of Hot Studio, two pioneers in this emerging field.  Kevin O’Malley, President, TechTalk/Studio was Moderator (Thank you, Kevin, for inviting me.  The program was enlightening).

Sincerely,

Teresa LeYung Ryan

Coach Teresa says: “Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.”  

To comment on any of my columns (blog posts), just click on the blue title bar of the post, fill in the boxes and press “submit.”  Please click here http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/ for Home Page of my blog.

]]> https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/a-week-of-wearing-3-hats-author-publisher-writing-career-coach/feed/ 2 https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/redwood-writers-conference-pure-joy/ https://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/redwood-writers-conference-pure-joy/#comments Sun, 31 Oct 2010 08:14:38 +0000 admin http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/?p=1631 Thank you Everyone for being there.  If you had filled out an evaluation form from my session, you’ll be receiving additional coaching notes from me about building your writer’s name.

Right now, please click on the blue title-bar of this post/column to get the comment boxes so that you can tell the world what your mission statement is (how you help a particular group of people with the themes/subject matters/issues in your literary work). Whether you write fiction or non-fiction, building your name is a breeze when you have your mission statement.   Here are examples . . .

* * * * * * * * *

(as fiction and narrative non-fiction writer)

I,Teresa LeYung Ryan, use my novel Love Made of Heart to inspire adult-children of mentally-ill parents to speak openly about the stigmas that their families suffer. My motto: Through my writing, I speak for those who cannot speak for themselves.

* * * * * * * * *

(as prescriptive/”how to” non-fiction writer)

I, Teresa LeYung Ryan, help writers create their mission statements with my workbook Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention. I say: Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.

* * * * * * * * *

After you fill in the boxes, copy your message (so that you’ll have your composition for your own websites/blogs/email signature blocks), then click the “submit” button in my blog post.  You must fill in the box for “email address” in order to submit comments to any blogs. After you press the “submit” button, your comment will be routed to my blog’s administrator for approval.  You will see your comment “published” on my blog in a day or so, sometimes sooner.

Also try this, to see how the Internet works.  In the Google search box, key in part of a phrase you wrote in your comment and your name (if you included your name in your comment); press Google search key.  Look how fast your entry can be found.

To get a free blog (no hosting fees), go to www.wordpress.com.  If you’d like to watch a video to see how to get a free blog and how to navigate, go here: http://wordpresscentral.org/ Linda Lee of http://askmepc.com/ created the tutorials.

How was the pre-conference poetry evening? How was the conference?  Redwood Writers Conference was pure joy! I’ll be posting photos and more links during the week.

I cheer for all writers who want to touch lives with their words.

Sincerely,
Teresa LeYung Ryan
Author / Writing Career Coach / Publisher

As a writing career coach and editor, I, Teresa LeYung Ryan, help writers identify themes, issues, and archetypes in their manuscripts and choose the right publishing routes.

To comment on any of my columns (blog posts), just click on the blue title bar of the post, fill in the boxes and press “submit.”  Please click here for other posts in my blog http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

Thank you Everyone for being there today.  If you had filled out an evaluation form, you’ll be receiving additional coaching notes from me about building your writer’s name.

Right now, click on the blue title-bar of this post/column to get the comment boxes so that you can tell the world what the themes are in your literary work.

* * * * * * * * *

Example:

(as fiction writer) I am Teresa LeYung Ryan and I use my novel Love Made of Heart to inspire adult-children of mentally-ill parents to speak openly about the stigmas that their families suffer. My motto: “Through my writing, I speak for those who cannot speak for themselves.”

* * * * * * * * *

Example:

(as non-fiction writer) I am Teresa LeYung Ryan and I help writers with my workbook Build My Name, Beat the Game: 22 Days to Identify & Develop My Writer’s Platform to Attract Agents, Acquisition Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention. I say: “Reach out, not stress out, when building your writer’s name/platform.”

* * * * * * * * *

After you fill in the boxes, copy your message (so that you’ll have your composition for your own websites/blogs/email signature blocks), then click the “submit” button in my blog post.  You must fill in the box for “email address” in order to submit comments to any blogs. After you press the “submit” button, your comment will be routed to blog’s administrator.  You will see your comment “published” on my blog in a day or so, sometimes sooner.

Also try this, to see how the Internet works.  In the Google search box, key in part of a phrase you wrote in your comment and your name (if you included your name in your comment); press Google search key.  Look how fast your entry can be found.

To get a free blog (no hosting fees), go to www.wordpress.com.  If you’d like to watch a video to see how to get a free blog and how to navigate, go here: http://wordpresscentral.org/ Linda Lee of http://askmepc.com/ created the tutorials.

I Cheer for Writers at California Writers Club October 17, 2010!  Happy California Writers Week (third week of October)!

Sincerely,
Teresa LeYung Ryan
Author / Writing Career Coach / Publisher

As a writing career coach and editor, I, Teresa LeYung Ryan help writers identify themes, issues, and archetypes in their manuscripts, and choose the right publishing routes.

To comment on any of my columns (blog posts), just click on the blue title bar of the post, fill in the boxes and press “submit.”  Please click here for other posts in my blog http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

photo by Joe Jackson: Celebrating California Writers Week, Don Hudson, Writing Career Coach Teresa LeYung Ryan, Lloyd Lofthouse, Jerry Mahoney, Alon Shalev hold up California Writers Club's banner at Oakland Public Library after meeting and presentations

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