Dear Folks who have been, are, or will be advocates and/or caregivers to a family member who has Parkinson’s,
I salute YOU! If I didn’t have caring friends, wise mentors, supportive spouse, dear sister, MaMah, and the information from Dr. Norman Doidge‘s book The Brain’s Way of Healing: Remarkable Discoveries and Recoveries from the Frontiers of Neuroplasticity, I would be in need of advocates and caregivers myself.
Last month, Papa fell again. No broken bones. No kidney damage. He sure is a lucky fellow. After his first fall earlier this year, the doctors and nurses explained to him (in Cantonese) and to me that when someone falls and cannot get up and is on the floor for hours, the muscles release a material into the bloodstream that could cause kidney damage. So, what did the doctor and interpreter at the hospital say this time? “Your father was dehydrated and weak. He needs to eat well, eat more. Encourage him. To eat more. To drink plenty of water.”
Aah, the word “encourage” contains the word “courage”.
Parkinson’s Disease has discouraged Papa – the disease has made Papa’s movement “smaller” – small steps, small voice, small hand-writing.
Encourage my father to do this, to do that? Sounds simple enough. Then why do I feel discouraged myself? Whatever happens, I must take good care of my own brain.
I am not fluent in Cantonese, Papa is not fluent in English -
At least twice in the past month, he got upset when I said something about myself (he thought I was talking about him). “Teresa, keep your cool,” I tell myself. (Thank you, mentor Lynn!)
I do not understand why Papa seems to be evasive when answering questions -
“Papa, when did you last eat?” I’d ask.
“I ate a lot,” he replies.
“What time?” I ask.
“A little while ago,” he says.
“What time? Six o’clock? Ten o’clock? Two? It’s two-thirty now. What time did you eat?”
“Eight.”
“Eight o’clock! That’s not a little while ago.” I can hear the irritation in my voice.
“Teresa, encourage him, not grill him.” (Thank you, NP Lim!)
I cringe just thinking about entering his apartment and getting blasted by the television volume set at 84 or the thermostat set at 80 degrees -
What can I do? I supposed . . . instead of asking (accusing) him “Is your hearing going?” and “Are you cold because you’re ill?” I could just turn down the two dials and engage him in conversation. (Thank you, dear Sasa!)
I, Teresa LeYung-Ryan, daughter of a father who has Parkinson’s, thank everyone who has helped my papa and Dr. Norman Doidge for writing his wonder-full book The Brain’s Way of Healing: Remarkable Discoveries and Recoveries from the Frontiers of Neuroplasticity.
Thank you to all the doctors, nurses, administration staffs, physical therapists, occupational therapists, speech therapists, interpreters, everyone at Self Help for the Elderly, folks in UCSF Movement Disorder and Neuromodulation Center, E.R. staffs, folks at St. Mary’s Hospital, SFGH Orthotics and Prosthetic Center, and the dear staff at the building where my papa lives.
Knowledge that leads to health and wellness – this is my wish for everyone.
Sincerely,
Teresa LeYung-Ryan, advocate for my Chinese papa
Please visit http://LoveMadeOfHeart.com/blog and http://WritingCoachTeresa.com for resources.
If you’d like to read Blog Post 1 of 3 in this series: http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/theme-consultant-teresa-leyung-ryans-blog-post-1-of-3-what-i-learned-about-the-brain-from-dr-norman-doidges-2-books/
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