Posts Tagged ‘story’

Dear Writers/Caregivers/Advocates for Loved Ones,

Coach Teresa LeYung-Ryan here . . .  I see how helping a loved one/being an advocate is so much like writing a book.

My papa has been diagnosed with Parkinsonism by his neurologist. If Papa is telling his story, he would be the first-person narrator; if I’m telling the story about him, then I would be the third-person narrator.

A book (story) consists of one main character (also known as “hero” or “protagonist”) or multiple main characters and other characters (other archetypes), a subject matter that is discussed repeatedly (“theme”) and at least one plotline (“what happened?”). The merging of these elements helps the writer show the hero’s journey.

Helping a loved one/being an advocate consists of at least 2 protagonists (YOU and the loved one) and other archetypes (physicians, healthcare and social service providers, other family members and friends, neighbors, coworkers, vendors, . . . the stranger who gives up her/his seat on the train for you), themes (the cause for help and advocacy and the related issues), and plotlines (the interconnected events associated with all the characters).  Who will be the most transformed in the story?  The loved one?  You the caregiver/advocate? The person who is most transformed would be the main character/hero/protagonist.  Perhaps both people will go through great transformation.  Two protagonists!

I am writing – I keep a notebook for whenever I visit my papa or when I do something on his behalf- gosh, there are so many little “subplots” to keep track of! (Is this Papa’s third or last session with the physical therapist? Mary and I need to witness the exercises so that when the P.T. closes the case, we would be able to coach Papa. Did he say he wanted another heating pad? Oh my, there are at least 18 model to choose from.   Gotta review friends’ advice about what is a comfortable bed and also Consumer Reports. Then Papa has to “test drive” some beds. You just can’t shop for a mattress the way you shop for a pair of shoes.

MATTRESS SHOPPING TIPS (from Sealy’s website)

  1. Plan to spend at least one hour in the store.
  2. Wear loose clothing and easily removable shoes.
  3. Test out mattresses in groups of three for easier comparison.
  4. Lie on each mattress for 5 to 15 minutes to let it fully adapt to your body.
  5. Don’t feel rushed. It’s ok to ask for privacy.

I would add:  Bring your own pillow so that your neck is supported while trying out mattresses; maybe bring an extra pillow case too.

And, I am reading the book The Brain’s Way of Healing: Remarkable Discoveries and Recoveries from the Frontiers of Neuroplasticity by Norman Doidge, M.D.  Chapter 2 is titled “A Man Walks Off His Parkinsonian Symptoms”  . . . how John Pepper has been able to reverse the major symptoms, the ones that Parkinson’s patients dread most, those that lead to immobility. He’s done so with an exercise program he devised and with a special kind of concentration . . .

All the “characters” in Dr. Doidge’s books (The Brain’s Way of Healing  and The Brain that Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science) and in Dr. Victoria Sweet‘s book (God’s Hotel: A Doctor, a Hospital, and a Pilgrimage to the Heart of Medicine) are guiding me on my journey as an advocate for my father.  And, I just know that my mom plays a huge role in helping me.

I thank everyone who has given me her/his time, energy, and prayers.

Here are links to websites I’ve relied on lately:

https://franceskakugawa.wordpress.com/category/caregiving/  Frances Kakugawa

http://www.writeradvice.com/ywmtdw.html  B. Lynn Goodwin

http://www.normandoidge.com/  Norman Doidge, M.D.

https://www.michaeljfox.org/  Michael J. Fox Foundation

Special thanks to Margie Yee Webb, Frances Kakugawa, Penny Manson, Debbie Ramos and her daughter Melanie who went out of their way to help me research specific items and to Mary, my sister Maria Leung, Linda Harris, Sue, Janet, and Elaine for being there in person.

Sincerely,

Writing Coach Teresa LeYung-Ryan

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author & Fanbase-Building Coach Teresa LeYung-Ryan says: “Reach out, not stress out. Enjoy your writer’s journey.”
http://WritingCoachTeresa.com

http://lovemadeofheart.com/

http://lovemadeofheart.com/blog/

https://www.youtube.com/user/teresaleyung

 

 

 

 

 

Before I answer that question, I’d like to introduce you to my colleagues who are fine poets / excellent performers of their poetry.  I had asked them to send me links to their articles about mothers.

By Yolande Barial, a mom of 3, contributor in the anthologies If Women Ruled the World and Oakland’s Neighborhoods :

http://yolandebarial.wordpress.com/2011/04/19/www-examiner-com/

http://www.redroom.com/blog/yolandebarial/happy-mothers-day

http://www.redroom.com/blog/yolandebarial/thanks-mom

http://www.redroom.com/blog/yolandebarial/like-daughterlike-mother

http://www.examiner.com/motherhood-in-stockton/yolande-barial

http://www.tracypress.com/view/full_story/12489710/article-Her-Voice–To-helmet-or-not-to-helment?instance=home_opinion_lead_story

Joan Gelfand’s article “Mother’s Day Without Mom” for the Huffington Post

And, here are authors whose books are about relationships with mothers or mother-figures:

Lynn Scott – A Joyful Encounter: My Mother, My Alzheimer Clients, and Me

Deborah Grossman - Goldie and Me

Luisa Adams - Woven of Water

Lynn Henriksen – Telltale Souls

Linda Joy Myers - Don’t Call Me Mother

Matilda Butler - Rosie’s Daughters

Kate Farrell - Wisdom Has a Voice: Daughters Remember Mothers

(me) Teresa LeYung Ryan - Love Made of Heart

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Coach Teresa, what did you do on Mother’s Day this year?

Thank you for asking.  The day before Mother’s Day, I had helped dear colleague Mary E. Knippel create multiple videos about her fun Coaxing Creativity workshops:

http://www.youtube.com/maryeknippel#p/a/u/0/xZ2GgqEE3Q4

http://www.youtube.com/maryeknippel#p/a/u/1/JsaPHrUvVfo

Her events are all inspiring. “Simple” and “abundant” best describe what I get from Mary Knippel’s workshops.

The next Day (Mother’s Day) I met artist Chandra Garsson on Hayes Street.

Lunch at La Boulange Cafe & Bakery was delightful, sitting in the corner, with view of the entire cafe and looking out onto Hayes Street. My mom would have liked this place. People eating tasty-looking salads, sandwiches, soups, baked goods; you can see the baked goods and pre-made sandwiches in the counters, all appealing. People reading newspapers and drinking beverages.  High ceiling; a European-feel about the place.

Then Chandra treated me to San Francisco Ballet’s hypnotically beautiful production of The Little Mermaid. The story (tragedy) was written by Hans Christian Andersen.

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=10150573069220430&oid=27923251292&comments
Principal dancer Yuan Yuan Tan says: “on stage … I am dancing without thinking.”

Thank you, Chandra, for giving me a day of bittersweet beauty.

I come home and there’s a Happy Mother’s Day e-card in my inbox from publicity expert Lin Lacombe. The animated card shows a wishing well. I make my wish for my mom–wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, I wish you lots and lots of joy and love.

Sincerely,

Teresa LeYung Ryan

author of Love Made of  Heart

Love Made of Heart - get this book for your mom or sister

author of Build Your Writer’s Platform & Fanbase In 22 Days

 

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http://www.youtube.com/savethelibraries  Click on “Chandra’s Story”

Beloved libraries are homes and community centers for kids, teens, seniors, job-seekers, you and me–anyone who needs a place to access books, resources, the Internet, and, especially librarians’ expertise.
Visit: http://savethelibraries.spaces.live.com/

We can all help and have fun at the same time.

In Oakland, CA?

1.  Attend any portion of the June 30, 2009 meeting, 5:00pm–late evening

Oakland City Council Meeting
Check   http://savethelibraries.spaces.live.com   for change in meeting time

City Council Chambers at Oakland City Hall
1 Frank H Ogawa Plaza
1 City Hall Plaza (the building with clock tower)
Oakland, CA 94612

2.  Tell friends about:  http://savethelibraries.spaces.live.com/

3.  Attend the next Save-the-Library advocacy meeting:

6:00 to 8:00 PM, Oakland Main Library-West Auditorium.   125 14th Street, Oakland, CA

http://savethelibraries.spaces.live.com/

Teresa LeYung Ryan here. I’m reading Byron Katie’s book LOVING WHAT IS. Also, I’m watching clips on www.TheWork.com

 

“The Work” is a simple yet powerful “process of inquiry” that teaches one how to identify and question thoughts that cause suffering.

I see the “process of inquiry” as the answer to live a stress-free life. Fascinating!
The 4 questions and the turn-around. Wow!

Byron Katie asks: “Who Would You Be Without Your Story?”

Since I’m a writer and my job is to write stories, “The Work” is helping me figure out what is healthful for me (the author) so that I can be really alive and write my protagonist’s story with clarity.

Thank you, Byron Katie! My gratitude to Dusky and Toni for recommending the book.



Cheers from

 

Coach Teresa LeYung-Ryan is the author of Build Your Writer’s Platform & Fanbase In 22 Days: Attract Agents, Editors, Publishers, Readers, and Media Attention NOW. Click here for print edition. Click here for Kindle edition. “Reach out, not stress out.”

Teresa’s novel Love Made of Heart: a Mother’s Mental Illness Forges Forgiveness in Daughter Ruby is used in college courses and archived at the San Francisco History Center.

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